I come to you today, hoping that all is well and wonderful in your world.
Now, on to the real stuff.
Have you ever thought about writing a book?
Have you ever had to come up with a striking title?
Have you ever failed miserably with titling your book?
(Ever have auto-correct fix tittling for titling?)
Of course you have because You're A Writer, or Aspiring Writer, or Someone Who Is Curious About Writing, or...just a great person who saw a link on social media (probably Twitter) and decided to click on it. And yes I know, that was a run-on sentence, and you should not begin a sentence with the word 'and'.
But this blog is about Horrible Book Titles.
Disclaimer:
These titles have not been Googled, I came up with them all by myself, so if one is the actual title of a book, my apologies. It is not my intent to ridicule any other author or writer.
I've been thinking about doing a poetry book
--well uh, yeah, you're calling yourself "Poet402" all over social media--Clarence!
So the poetry book will have different topics, but one topic that will be explored will be (drumroll please!)....Mental Health. If there appears to be a theme within the list, that is why.
1. Shattered Dreams
-This one fits on one of my planes of thought, however it leaves the remainder of the planes high and dry. Plus I actually have a chapbook out there called Shattered, and I have a thing about going back and re-using stuff. (titles at least)
2. Un-Liberated
-This one just feels off, it feels off poetically, it feel like it misses the target. But some how I like the Liberated portion and thought it would go good after an "Un". Boy am I wrong. However part of me feels that this book will be liberating for me, at least in some ways. But Un-Liberated? No terrible— NEXT!
3. True Marketer’s Guide to Independent Wealth (not really, it’s a poetry book)
-Now while I love the sarcastic tone of this title. I just know it’ll never work, plus someone has probably already titled a book like that deep in LuLu’s database. However if you’re reading this with the knowledge that it doesn’t exist anywhere (even the bowels of LuLu’s database) just PayPal me 5 bucks like I’m on fivver & we’ll call it square💕
4. High Fives with Four Fingers
-I came up with this title while at work. Now I wish I could say I had no idea what I was thinking, but unfortunately do know. We all want success, however we're all crippled by one thing or another; we all want high fives (success) but most of us only have four fingers (crippled). In the mental health field, there are always some type of hurdle our clients or patients have, and the same is true of us. We want success, but we have a drinking problem, or a fear problem, or we just don't believe in ourselves. It's not the worst, but still it's pretty horrible unless one can read into the title. And let's be clear, some won't and it'll be a loss.
5. Past, Present, & Future Lives In-Between the Lines
-Once again, a reference to life book title. I've been considering doing a poetry book that has chronicled my life through poetry. Sometimes I can create some pretty good life lessons through my verses. But ultimately I don't like this title because it's long and wordy.
6. It Ain't Got to Rhyme to be Good Like Grey Goose
-A part of me really likes this a lot. It's reminiscent of my "Chicken Soup & A Shot of Jack" title. I think that's why I'm feeling it. It's of the vein of an "Alcoholic" series I've done with my spoken word work. However, in the end I don't think people will connect with it the way I want folks too...moving on.
7. Off My Rocker Rhythms
-This is not the worst, but still not the best. I think it fits the subject matter of the poems, but I'm also fearful that people will be offended by it. And I want them to at least pick up the book and be offended by some of the poems (lol)
8. It's Madness Not Metered Lines
-This one is a bit of a dig at the writing, and editors, and publishers. Poetry can be very snobbish, as can be editors and publishers. Not many people publish poetry books because historically they just don't sell, and when you couple the subject of mental health--it's a loser. Now granted making money is not a top concern, but I would like for this book to do well, so yea, "Madness & Metered Lines" I feel is a loser--NEXT!
9. Ranting and Rooting. It's OK To Be Me
-I really like the sentiment of this title, because I actually had someone refer to my poetry as ranting. And like every other poet and writer I've been criticized for a multitude of reasons. But I still have people root for me, and ultimately, I know, it's ok being me. Sometime you need to express that to others...but this may not be the right time and circumstance.
Well that's the list folks! Hope you had fun reading and what-not. And if you feel like I've made a mistake, and you really like one of the titles, please drop a comment, hit me up on Twitter and let me know. I'm trying to not for the pure satisfaction of writing, I want to gain a following and have that following enjoy what is put out! So hit me up and....have a great day!
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