Doodles from Thurs 3-20-Tues 3-25

I promise you one thing, the doodles here will not be the greatest doodles ever, you may find some poetry, but even that is pretty bad, and there will be no Wednesday doodle...I believe.  Tomorrow we go on our zip-line field trip, so this week is what it is.  The doodles will begin with Thursday of last week and go until today...3-25-14.  So enjoy if you can....

That's all for now folks....we'll see how zip-lining goes!!!!!!

Monday/Tuesday Update

So it's Monday, 3-24-14, around 11:30am, and I'm work  It's quiet, but I'm suppose to be getting to lunch duty.  And I have no lunch, so I'll be ordering something, or running to get it.  I have to get to lunch duty, so when I come back, I am hoping to have the time to tell you all about my Sunday...11:33...gotta get it, be back....

1:59pm, and I'm back, listening to the boys interact with the teacher, havin' some fun.  They are suppose to be workin' on some poetry, but they are actually having a discussion about 40 being old and racing.  OK, on to the evening of Sunday....

So I was invited to do this benefit for these charities a couple weeks back, and Sunday was the performance.  Now I received this itinerary on Thursday or Friday, which stated that I would go on at 8pm after a soloist.  It also stated that a sound-check would occur from 3-6, happy hour at 6:30, etc. etc. etc.  So I went to sound check around 3:30, no one was there, at least not anyone that I had known ie Brea Bowman.  I ended up staying there until around 4:20 and then left because no one from sound was there. Also one of the wait-staff mentioned something that they had to get the rest of the money for renting the space.  That information did not settle me at all.  I was already pretty nervous, and now I was a bit doubtful. So I never made it to sound-check, but did arrive around 7:15.  And to my surprise, the place was packed out.  So I was able to find Brea's people easy.  Soon after I arrived the host "the entertainer, the limo driver" got on stage, and attempted to warm up the crowd.  Now I was in a room behind the bar off-stage and was able to hear the amount of crowd noise that was happening as the "host" was trying to win over the crowd.  He spent about 7 min. tops on trying to settle them down.

When I was called out, me, my sax, and poetry were ready, however, it didn't seem like the crowd was. They never got down to even a dull roar, it was constant; they were loud, they were rude, they were not listening.  I addressed the crowd and they were just not feelin' me.  It was like they heard the word poet, or poetry and were instantly turned off.  Hell, I felt like I could of been Amri Baraka, or even Maya Angelou, ......(helping my boys with their poetry and blogging at the same time)......
and they would of been just as disrespectful and rude.  I was already pretty nervous, but now it began to seep into my performance.  Granted I had some note-cards, but my horn started squeaking a bit, and the rhythm of the piece just began to fall to pieces.  The crowd got louder and then quiet, but maintained a definite presence as I attempted to perform.  It was rough, mid-way through the piece I wasn't sweaty, I wasn't enunciating, I wasn't into the piece anymore, I just wanted to get done, and get off stage.

3-25 2:41pm (Tuesday...yea, I know I'm late)

I ended up finishing the piece, the crowd was pleased due to the fact it was done.  As I walked back-stage
Brea gave me a light "good job", and so did the camera guy I had met earlier.  However I also heard a "that's a bad start" from some female voice...then I knew it was time to go.  I packed up my stuff and headed out. The crowd was still pretty loud, but I didn't feel like sticking around--not even for a free showing of Lyfe.
I was embarrassed, I felt bullied.  Now I will usually joke about bullies, being bullied, or being a bully at work, but this time I felt what it was like.  Seriously, I felt like I was back in high school, and the cool kids had invited me as a joke, then played me when I was on stage.  I know what Carrie felt like and why she did what she did.

So yea, instead of staying and possibly meeting a good R & B singer, I left early, was embarrassed and went to my hole in the wall bar and drank it away.  Hope u all enjoyed the Carrie clip, it's the original.  So yea, if a mothafucker embarrasses you, do like Carrie...and burn they ass up!....doodles coming in next segment!!!

Rebounding from a bad week---posting Wednesday 3-19-14

So I admit, I got real lazy on this post and have added a video to "enhance" the experience. Yea, right, just joking...I'm lazy and don't feel like typing so in order to save me, I just did a video. However, there is some poetry below, so check the vid, the doodles and the poety...yay, and thanks.
402~~~

Here is the Tuesday doodle from 3-11

So sorry that's it's like really barren, but honestly, I just was not feelin' it on Tuesday of last week.  Like I said, last week was shit, shit, shit.













And Thursday's doodle 3-13

Yep, it got a bit better by Thursday....but not much.  We did TCAP testing Tuesday and Wednesday, and everyone (kids and staff) were kinda wiped so that's why the doodles are what they are...sorry...but yea, not really.











Lookout....here comes FRIDAY!!!!...and Monday wrapped into one!!

So yea, I was on some paper saving, incomplete page kinda stuff when I did this.  Friday, one of our lovely boys did not follow directions and when the fire drill occurred, he went on a little excursion through the neighborhood, and kicked some trash cans.  Luckily our neighbors weren't offended and mom came and picked his ass up.

So yea, Monday 3-19 was like a new start for me.  All last week I was on time, and to date, I've been on time.  I'm not completely over it, but I'm workin' on it.  Two things on Monday was one of our two girls kinda blew in the room....if you see the doodle about "horns sprouting", its a reference to her and how her hair looked as she was acting out and playing with the air vents.
The 2nd thing was my teacher gave me the floor to help with the slam poetry stuff he wanted to do.  It went cool but I had one kid, 8th grader, who was having a shit morning and didn't want to do it.  So I ended up talking to him, but he wouldn't give into what was bothering him.  So I did what any poet would do and penned a piece about it from what I thought was his viewpoint...please view below...

Bottle Top

Sodas and pops

used to come in glass bottles

with a cap on top.

You could shake them,

with all the force you have

then, pop the top…

and soda would spread everywhere.

My chest gets like that sometime (carbonated)

Pressurized to the point of

breaking and popping

yet my rib cage and chest plate

can’t be popped unless

I’m sedated on a surgeon’s table

and today, that’s just not the case

Something happened to me

this morning before my day began;

Like someone was shaking the

shit outta my bottle &

I was ready to spit soda outta everywhere.

I wear my heart on my sleeve,

feelings on my face; if I’m

pissed you know it,

like this soda that’s been shaken…

just don’t ask me to explain it;

Refuse to verbalize it;

don’t give me some b.s.

feelings assignment--

poetry is gay-er than that

kid I hate who took my seat--

Fuck ya’ll

It’s 10 am and I still got

this same defeated look

plastered on my face.

I got “support” followin’ me

and checkin’ up on me

like they some CIA agents

waitin’ on a Hiroshima type effect

to happen on the 2nd floor

Carbonation may have

crept down; but bubbles remain

rising from the bottom, making it

to the top--just not pushing the top,

off…

I am a Pepsi bottle with a knot

in the middle

It’s lunchtime, & I’m hopeful

that spicy chicken will burn

these bubbles that tightens my chest

Maybe, if spicy enough, the chicken

will make my eyes water, and tear up,

so I can finally release….

It’s 2pm and I’m joking and smiling

All is not well, but its better

You can tell from my tone and

slouching position, I have

given up, I don’t care--

I dare you to redirect

my sleeping stance.

Tuesday 3/18 was not a real bad day...they have a program that they run called "Why Try"...the curriculum kinda sucks and the kids hate it, but we all gotta suffer through it.  In any case, this is the majority of what the doodle is about, because they were talking about crabs in a hot pot, pulling each other down etc.  Here is a "poem-thought" I had when doodling.

Red Crab

sits & stews 

with Anger & blues

b/c authority figures

figure to help him out

but red crab (would)

rather stew in hot pot

& burn in own dramatic 

pity--

So Wednesday was pretty chill, a small bump over competition at the end, but nothing really major.  TCAP testing resumed this week, and I jotted down some poetic thoughts...if you can't read them then read below...enjoy...

3 Shorts on Wednesday

My parents were 

quick to snap with a 

“who the hell do you think you are?”

Anytime I half-ass 

came sideways at them--

Experience in humility, 

at least weekly,

until I became humble,

in my delivery.

Brainstormin' backdrops 

for needle drop beats

inter-netted to me—mp3,

conversion.  Society ill

sick, not shut-in; shuttin' 

out more than what justice 

ever did; so I talk to 

the streets with my 9 as 

penicillin shootin' out the 

viruses invading righteous 

space.

In my

blue shirt, blue jeans,

blue tie, & shoes,

he told me

I reminded him of the ocean—

I replied

relaxing right???

Took me back to 

New Years', San Diego...

Today, 

I don't hate that kid.

So that's the post folks, I won't be back until after Sunday because I got a performance coming up for a charity benefit.  I'll post the flyer below and update the blog sometime next week to let you know how it all went...duccies (deuces) for now...

They forgot to put me on the flyer, but eh oh well...i'll try to get a pic with Lyfe for proof...lol

Monday March 10

So this is like my most intricate doodle to date.  It's partly due to me working on it literally all day.

And this is how the day played out.....

The school has been in "stress the test" mode like all week, hell all month.  And I understood; it meant me and the kids would really need to be on time and shit....

So my Monday started off with me in the room doin my attendance/early notes thang.  However, after we did the MELT & got kids off to class, Mr. Gilbert asked me to attend a meeting. We walked down the hall to Mr. Magana's office.  There I was interrogated, and berated about the poor attendance I had displayed throughout the year.  Mr. Magana all but accused me of falsifying my time card.  I ended up telling them I would work harder on coming in on time and not calling out.

So alot of this has arisen due to the heffa Lindsey in payroll.  Ever since getting the position I have had the feeling she doesn't like me, doesn't respect, doesn't want to share the same air.  So yea, she's faulty.  In any case, she's stays on my time-sheet like she's gonna get a fuckin bonus for whatever.  So when the whole "meeting" shit occurred, I heard her name a couple of times and just got further aggrivated.  I'm disgusted with this school, the admin staff, and the whole "AN Team" thing....So yea, I'm tryin to figure it out; and feelin' pretty un-appreciated at the same time...so yea, Monday kinda sucked.

 I'm in fuck it mode--Monday after the so-called meeting, I didn't redirect one single child--I just doodled.  The only good thing to come out of Monday was seeing Amber from
EYC and eating some really good PHO then having some 2 for 1 beer.  

I'm not sure if I'm going to make it to the end of the year; and/or next year.  I am not happy but neither are they--it's a bit of a stalemate...

Feb-March Beginning

So throughout this period, I was truly unmotivated.  My doodles were intermitant as was my attendance.  I'm beginning to pay for it now (3-10-14).  However I was having a good time at the time that these were done.  So by all means, enjoy the doodles and I'll be back later today most likely to give you all a true update.

This was like the middle to end of February, and we had begun to start talking about TCAP testing...yippee f'ing skippee.

See how we went from Wednesday to Monday....yea, see that what I was talking about with the inconsistency of days....so sorry I was a bit irresponsible, and missed some work--eh...

Just a enlarged view

Remember how I said that I found a website called wordle, well I was working on a poem for a wordle and this doodle came out of it.  I will post the poem later today when I re-edit this post.  I'm just not sure what day this was...possibly Monday because it is on the back of Monday--yippee...

Oh Tuesday, Tuesday, Tuesday....I believe Monday one of our wonderful boys acted out and never took ownership or responsiblities for his actions.  So on Tuesday I was thinking of questions for writings that he could do when he behaved like he did.  Unfortunately I never followed through with it...eh....oh well.  Also this day it appears that I was doing some math fractions, probably due to the boys dealing with fractions...yay.

Well this doodle definitly has some poetry in it.  I'll have to read over what I got here and type it up.  I doubt it's any good, but eh...it is what it is....

 Well the 2-27 doodle is pretty explicit.  I do mention my co-worker by name because we were joking around about her supervising another of our para's and saying she was a bad supervisor.  It was all in good fun, but I'm just not a big fan of hers.  I was able to find some good colored pencils and do some stuff.  "Whack" was referring to a kid who just kept saying the word, everything that day was whack--so it became a doodle...

For reasons I will not state right now, the end of Feburary I was feeling very alone, and not a part of the room or group, so I doodled that feeling.  Its not a bad doodle, just one that kinda goes with the day...I'll enlarge it below

So we can see from the last three doodles, we are clearly getting ready for testing and things like that.  It was Tuesday TCAP day because they were talking about testing and strategies and getting enough rest and stuff...pretty standard, but it's freakin middle school.

The next doodle with all the poetry stuff on it was me being there but not present.  I got a opportunity to perform some spoken word for this benefit.  It seems cool, and it was what was on my mind.

The last doodle I like alot because it was me workin' with a kid in the morning, and then turning math examples into a doodle.  It was a pretty good day, because I was able to actually help kids.

Well, those are the doodles for this post, hope you have enjoyed.  The next post will hopefully go up later today, and it will be a doosy...because right now I gotta figure if we're gonna keep doin this "school" thing....truly yours,

Poet402